A reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan to a pretty girl seeking a
rich husband
Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.
From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money" : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.
Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.
By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position".
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.
Hope this reply helps.
signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO
A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?
I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here.
I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.
You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.
My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?
I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?
Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit.
If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.
I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty
Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?
I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here.
I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.
You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.
My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?
I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?
Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit.
If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.
I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty
A philosophical reply from CEO of
J.P. Morgan:
Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.
From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money" : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.
Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.
By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position".
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.
Hope this reply helps.
signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO
********************************************************************
LOL! This is so funny! I really "applaud" Ms's Pretty's "candidness" with coming up with these questions on a forum. For awhile, I wondered WHAT is James Dimon doing in such a forum? LOL. However, since it's all over internet and there wasnt any denial, I suppose the reply is authentic.
Mr Dimon is definitely blunt to the point of demeaning. Poor young lass. For someone who's so proud of her looks and who believed her looks can fetch her a rich husband but just short of an opportunity, she'll definitely be crushed.
But seriously, how can anyone be so stupid?
Candidness is an adorable trait, ONLY if you choose the right point to be candid about. If you choose to be candid by exposing your flaws, that's quite a dumbest thing one can do. Nobody admires a materialistic girl, especially one who can say nothing about herself except her age and her "pretty" looks.
The most ironic thing will be, I realized all these "pretty" girls who are always lemming after rich husbands, usually ends up with nothing, and most of them end up on the shelves because they set too high a standard, rejecting all the guys who didnt make their cut. Instead, the sincere girls who arent lemming for anything except true, everlasting love, somehow end up with great husbands, most of them well-to-do.
I definitely wont say I have a rich husband(we live so humbly) although most of my friends always remark that he is(maybe to them). Everytime I say "This this this is so worth it, only $$$ after a 30% discount etc! Go buy!", I've always been rebutted, "Woah...I dont have a rich husband like you lor." with a slight sour or bitter tone. It usually turns my face green and I just dont know what to say. Through time, I've stopped sharing such stuff, which are great deals, in my humble opinion. I seriously dont feel we are rich or well-to-do in any way. Many a time when friends ask me how much or where I got my stuff, I will bluntly say I buy this from somewhere because it's cheaper there, OR, I'll say I buy this only after there's a 20% discount or something. But somehow, people love to comment "you're so lucky to have a rich husband who dotes on you." I guess we felt pretty down-to-earth because we have many friends who are doing better in other ways. However there are quite a few similar things I noticed about all the wives, including me.
1) We are SIMPLE
Simple doesnt mean we are simple-minded. It simply means we are not the type who like to play mind games. We are faithful, with only a few past serious relationships lasting for years. We dont belong to the group of super gorgeous heart-breakers who holds track records of ever dated 20+ boyfriends for as short as a month, or proudly declared that we ever 2-timed or never single for past a month, that kinda thing. We all have a very simple background.
2) We are NOT materialistic
I've just realized, all the wives were already together with their husbands as boyfriends and girlfriends, way before they become who they are now. Like I said, it's never money we're looking at prior to dating. We're not obsessed with money. Frankly speaking, dont think that guys are dumb, like what James Dimon said. Firstly, nobody likes a materialistic girl. And even you're great at acting you're not one, guys are not that dumb to dont realize you're exactly one.
3) We have ATTITUDE/PERSONALITY
We are not afraid to say NO to our partners and wont hesitate at all to voice our displeasures or different opinions whenever a discussion is at hand. In short, we're not doormats or pushovers and can be rather a bitchy chillipadi at times when being riled. We are ready to walk away if ever being mistreated and we made that CLEAR.
4) We are INDEPENDENT and CONFIDENT
We have our own careers and our own clique of friends, and does not cling to husbands like a leech. We're independent and loves to have our freedom, and in turn, we also give them the same freedom. We are confident and comfortable in our own skin. We are down to earth and just love being ourselves
5) We LOVE alot
Humans are afterall very sensitive animals. How deep you can love someone OR his money, he can definitely feel it. Because of this love, it leads to alot of care and concern, which means we take good care of our husbands, for e.g, his diet, his safety etc. A man will only marry a wife who's concerned about taking good care of him, instead of one who only care about spending his money.
6) We dont dictate how he manage his CAREER
In short, we only take care of small things at home, for e.g, whether this sofa is suitable for the living room or which brand of oven to buy. Big things like how he should advance his career, or how much or where he should invest, is totally up to him. Guys dont mind wives deciding such minor stuffs, instead they loves it, because he got much more important matters at hand to handle. So dont bother him with nitty-gritty stuff but perhaps, give him the top 3 choices to have a final say. But believe me, he'll definitely take your suggestion; he just wants to have the final say even though the final say is based on what you suggest. =)
7) We dont COMPLAIN (as much)
It's so very common for females to complain isnt it? But generally I think we hardly complain. We dont kick up a fuss when they reach home late at 12midnight or jump simply because they didnt return a call. Trust is the key. It simply shows you're a mature lady who trust him, and not a possessive, paranoid freak baby which he need to baby-sit.
8) We can CONNECT with them
It's good to understand their work, so that if they want a second opinion or a listening ear, they can count on you. Be sensitive, intuitive and knowledgeable. Share views or insights on interesting topics. Be astute and understanding. Great minds think alike. The more you can connect, the more brain stimulation he has and the more he will find you attractive in your own way.
9) We are GOOD with his FAMILIES
This might be more important than you think it is. If he is a man of honor and success, he will definitely be appreciative of his parents who contributed in some ways to what he is today. Able to click with his family with his parents' approval means something to him.
10) We (generally) DONT force him to CHANGE
It's impossible that a couple never argue about their differences. But the main thing is we'll try to accommodate each other's differences and never try to forcefully change the way they think or behave, drastically. For example, if he dont like to go shopping then dont force him to go shopping with you. Get your friends instead. Everything works both ways. Dont change yourself entirely just to please him too, unless it's a positive change for your own life.
Of course looks and figure does play a part in attracting rich men or just men in general. Men are visual creatures. You need to attract their attention before they are willing to get to know you. Dress with style, well-maintained skin, figure, hair and teeth will definitely be a plus point. But, after knowing you, it's your personality that's able to hold him to your side forever. Carry yourself well with poise. Think before you speak. Rich men have tons of girls around them, most of them soul-less, some of them shallow. Just be yourself. Dont think too much all the time. Sometimes it's simply you thinking too much. Rich men, or men, are simply men.
Ultimately, I believe fate does play a part. Other than the normal chemistry, dont be so silly to do everything a wife does when you are ONLY a girlfriend. Theory is simple. If you do everything a wife does and let him be so aware of your everlasting love BEFORE you're even his wife, then WHY should he make you his wife? You're already treating him like a husband so he dont need to marry you. The moment he knows that you will never leave him marks the day he erase "marriage" from his dictionary. Let them know you can be perfectly great even without them. Let them be the one to feel that they cant live without you. Care for them without being overly clingy and naggy. Keep your choices open. Dont lose contact with your guy friends. Keep your "market value" always. When he's sure that you are The One(takes a very bloody long time) OR worried that somebody else will snatch you away(works so much faster *winks*), only will he "surrender" and marry you.
Anyway, I feel generally nobody is dispensable and you're entirely good to be by yourself or with another person. LOVE YOURSELF, only then will a man love you and treat you with importance.
Ultimately, I believe fate does play a part. Other than the normal chemistry, dont be so silly to do everything a wife does when you are ONLY a girlfriend. Theory is simple. If you do everything a wife does and let him be so aware of your everlasting love BEFORE you're even his wife, then WHY should he make you his wife? You're already treating him like a husband so he dont need to marry you. The moment he knows that you will never leave him marks the day he erase "marriage" from his dictionary. Let them know you can be perfectly great even without them. Let them be the one to feel that they cant live without you. Care for them without being overly clingy and naggy. Keep your choices open. Dont lose contact with your guy friends. Keep your "market value" always. When he's sure that you are The One(takes a very bloody long time) OR worried that somebody else will snatch you away(works so much faster *winks*), only will he "surrender" and marry you.
Anyway, I feel generally nobody is dispensable and you're entirely good to be by yourself or with another person. LOVE YOURSELF, only then will a man love you and treat you with importance.
Finally, if you really want to attract a rich man, firstly, be at-least somewhere near rich yourself. Earn your own keep. When you earn more, you'll speak with confidence. When you meet more people, you'll get more worldly. More importantly, he'll look at you and treat you with more respect. That's when he starts to give you more attention because in his mind, you're not his inferior but his par. Or at least, not a degrading gold digger.
Lastly, I wish James Dimon can see this entry. I would love to hear his views~ Haha~
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